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12/01/2011 Artistic Scripted Gamer Podcast
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Front Mission Evolved PS3

Front Mission Evolved



Further reading:
Scripted Gamer Pilot episode

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In Today's Scripted Gamer Fred and Bob go ice skating, or something like that.

Confused? Listen to the Scripted Gamer Pilot episode to meet our reviewers and hear how it all started that fateful day.

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Scene: Bob and Fred are sat on a sofa with two PS3 controllers . Bob looks very bored

Fred: Well....you can't say we didn't try

Bob: That is very true

Fred: we gave it a good chance

Bob: that we did

Fred: but I'm afraid there is no denying the fact

Bob: ice skating robots are cool!

Fred: What???

Bob: ice skating robots are cool!

Fred: excuse me?


Fred: No I heard you fine but what are you talking about? There is no ice in this weeks game

Bob: game?

Fred: Yes this weeks game! I thought you were going to say something about it.

Bob: well what did you think I was going to say?

Fred: That this weeks game is just not that good, good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to scripted gamer today's game is front mission evolved

Bob: More like backwards mission devolved

Fred: Bob!

Bob: what! it is devolved

Fred: hmm front mission evolved is a third person robot avatar game where you play a character that sits in and controls a giant robot who can walk, hover

Bob: ice skate!

Fred: No Bob it doesn't ice skate

Bob: well it should

Fred: and fire multiple weapons

Bob: Which would be fine if it wasn't dull as dishwater

Fred: Bob!

Bob: Well it is. There are tons of other games that have done the same kinda thing but much much better

Fred: for example

Bob: well lost planet for one and not even the 2nd one. The first one which was an alright game, but even that which was released donkeys years ago is better than this

Fred: why exactly?

Bob: cos it had an ice skating robot! Which is just cool

Fred: Well it would be wouldn't it

Bob: What?

Fred: It would be...cool ha ha

Bob: Say again?

Fred: It would be cool

Bob: I'm not sure I follow...

Fred: Because itís skating on ice you idiot. It was a joke for goodness sake

Bob: How about you leave the funny bits to me mate alright, you haven't got the whole comic timing thing down quite yet

Fred: I'll have you know I can be incredibly funny

Bob: of course you can mate, so like I was saying games like lost planet and transformers even are just better games and this one is soooooooo repetitive

Fred: I am funny

Bob: I know you are mate. It just goes on and on. Fight a few robots and tanks and then fight a boss robot, upgrade, move on do it all again. Bored ,bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored!

Fred: Man Walks into a bar.....ouch ha haa

Bob: ohh you try so hard

Fred: Horse walks into the bar. Barman says ďwhy the long faceĒ

Bob: So to sum it up unless you live and breathe for this genre of game....avoid it. Itís just not good

Fred: In fact I'd go as far as to say itís a bit....... robotic

Bob: oh mate that was bad even by your standards

Fred: It was funny

Bob: We've been the scripted gamers

Fred: Philistines

Bob: Goodnight

Written by Adam Moran

You can support Adam by buying Front Mission Evolved

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Adam Moran writes the Scripted Gamer column.

"Here, we find out what happens when theatre meets videogames. We will soon be hitting the road and performing our review scripts infront of a real living audience."

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