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In Today's Scripted Gamer Fred and Bob discuss a teenie tiny Lara Croft.
Confused? Listen to the Scripted Gamer Pilot episode to meet our reviewers and hear how it all started that fateful day.
Scene: BOB and FRED are sat on a sofa with two Xbox 360 controllers. Bob is looking puzzled as Fred sits beside him
Fred: You all right there mate you look a tad perplexed
Bob: I am a bit mate, if I'm honest
Fred: And whatís got you so confused
Bob: You know Lara Croft
Fred: The female Indiana Jones?
Bob: Yeah the really fit one off the tomb raider series
Fred: Yes I definitely know of her work
Bob: Well, sheís kinda shrunk
Bob: Sheís shrunk, as in sheís not as big as once she was
Fred: Sheís not as big
Bob: Nope. Itís like someone has put her through the washer at a high temperature and shrunk her
Fred: are you feeling alright? You're talking nonsense
Bob: No look see there she is on the screen but smaller
Fred: well would you look at that so she is
Bob: hello mini Lara
Fred: you know why thought don't you
Bob: Well no, I just heard there was a new tomb raider game, so I downloaded it
Fred: You mean Lara Croft and the guardian of Light
Bob: Thatís the one, so I downloaded it and when I started playing it there she was all small
Fred: Thatís because itís not a normal tomb raider game itís an x-box live arcade game and they have tried out a different system from the usual
Bob: That would make sense, itís pretty fun, you can solve puzzles and take on challenges and throw spears which magically reappear in your hand and you can jump on them and get to high places and you can do it as a multiplayer and....
Fred: so I take it you like it
Bob: Yeah itís well good I quite like Lara lite
Fred: Hee hee little Lara
Bob: thatís a good one how about tiny raider
Fred: Mini croft
Bob: ha we've been the scripted gamers good night
With so many different perspectives it can be hard to know where to start - a little like walking into a crowded pub. Sorry about that.
But so far we've not found a way to streamline our review output - there's basically too much of it. So, rather than dilute things for newcomers we have decided to live with the hubbub while helping new readers find the columnists they will enjoy.
Our columnists each focus on a particular perspective and fall into one of the following types of gamers: